Review: Bad Parts: A Supernatural Thriller

Bad Parts: A Supernatural Thriller by Brandon McNulty
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

I truly wasn't expecting to like this supernatural horror novel as much as I did.

In a poor attempt to summarize after a night of little sleep: Ash is a musician who has her hand destroyed by a mysterious attacker after a show one night. A big gig is coming up, and she's desperate to fix it. Healing on it's own would take too long. In her home town, there happens to be a creek where an entity - I'm unsure if it's referred to as a demon in my tired state - can trade people body parts for their bad ones. There are some catches. Only one body part of any type is available. This goes for sets as well. One of the major points in the book revolves around a set of eyes. The only way to get a new pair once claimed is to either kill the current owner of them or drive them beyond the town's border where they will lose them. Everyone who trades with the entity are forced to stay within a certain radius. In order to get her hand, Ash is forced to gather people to trade specific parts. Meanwhile, the Traders are led by a lady named Candace who opposes Ashley and all her attempts.

For whatever reason, despite the description in the book, I kept picturing Sue Atkins as Candace. Yikes?

Once I started, I was really driven to finish this book. It gets wilder and wilder. I couldn't believe at the halfway point with everything going on in the book that there was still another half to go. It was all worth it. It doesn't necessarily end on too happy a note. There were characters I liked a lot that didn't make it which is acceptable for the type of book it is. I was shocked at how some of them went down. I also realized towards the end that nobody really has any set of morals. Even the good people are willing to do whatever it takes to get what they want (body parts, ect.)

The first chapter should have been listed as the prologue. The second chapter was the weakest for me. The music aspect of the book was a turn off but that's a personal thing.

The author also hints in the notes afterwards about more to come so hopefully there'll be a followup.

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Review: The Kingdom of Liars

The Kingdom of Liars by Nick Martell
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

If you did a mash-up of the Mistborn Series and the Kingkiller Chronicles, you would have something similar to this book. It leans more towards Sanderson, with sprinkles of other influences throughout. No matter what I compare it to, it still felt fresh and exciting.

The prologue leads us into the story as Michael is sentenced to be executed. The book thereafter is the story about how he got into this predicament and not only is it a page turner but it's also one of the best books I've read all year. I am quick to point out things I don't like even in books I love. There's always something negative I find. Not this time. This is Nick Martell's debut novel and clearly we are all privileged to be alive while someone is putting out quality work like this.

Back to the story: Michael wants to better the life of his siblings and ailing mother, but they live condemned because their father had killed the prince and was subsequently executed. They were branded as traitors and although they come from high noble lineage, they are not treated poorly. All this turns into one of the books plot lines where Michael has to find out if his father really did commit the crime or not. We also have to find out if Michael is guilty of murdering the king as he had been accused in the prologue of. There's magic and modern weaponry (Guns). The moon itself is split seven ways and pieces of it plummet to the ground. A rebellion has threatened the kingdom in the name of Michael's father. There's a missing but not really princess and an arrogant prince we love to hate. A variety of other characters flesh out the supporting cast and I am so in love with the world that Martell has created that I am apologizing to my wallet preemptively because I will buy everything that Nick writes. He is just that good.

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Review: Hockey in the Wild

Hockey in the Wild by Nicholas Oldland
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Beaver wants to go swimming in the lake but it's frozen over! So what should he do? Call his buddies Moose and Bear to come play Hockey instead. This is a cute story that I found myself smiling at on multiple occasions. First of all, let me digress. I live in Florida. We have Hockey teams but they are mainly second nature to us. I am from New York though, so I do have a passion for it which is why this book jumped out at me. All that being said, I think the book is stylized enough where children that don't have a connection to Hockey would still think it was a fun book. Which is why I bring all of this up. It's a great example of not being exposed to something, but still being able to enjoy it.

The Artwork! Credit where credit is due: how clever! Some of these scenes, like the bear eating pizza while the moose lounges on the couch or when all three animals are halfway through the ice..those are so memorable. So is the beaver in the speedo. This is something I can see kids running to the classroom shelves and picking up to read at their desk.

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Review: Lazarus

Lazarus by Lars Kepler
My rating: 1 of 5 stars

I refuse to believe that this book is part of an international bestselling series. I haven't read any of the other books. Instead, I choose to come into this blindly because the cover was interesting and it's from Sweden. When I was done "letting the book happen to me" because that's what it felt like, I tried to look up whether this was a translation or was written in English. There's nothing in the kindle copy which says, as far as I could find. Although it turns out the author is a husband-wife duo.

I am not a guy who does well with Grammar. I'm an ok writer but not great by any means. My mother thinks I should write professionally but mothers are like that. I'm very honest about my shortcomings. I'm also not a professional in the book industry, so take everything I say for my own opinion and nothing else.

It's not even a distaste but a pure disgust that I have for anyone's work of which they write like this:
The man...
The color of the door..
The boat...
The priest...
The hat...

I just made up those examples but the prologue did have a priest who took a boat to get somewhere so it's semi related. I find using "The" to start sentences over and over to be a poor standard. The section doesn't even pace well. Now, when the writers break out of this it does pick up but then they find themselves right back here. Sometimes I felt like an elementary school kid was writing. Other times I felt like it struggled between being a story I was about to get caught up in and then it pulled me out to sound like someone telling me what was going on instead of showing me. It could be the language barrier as I'm sure English isn't the writer's first language, being from Sweden and all. It may be for stylistic purposes that I feel just don't work. I'm hoping it's not a translator's choice to do this.

The story itself was alright. Presentation is key though, and this missed that mark.

*Goodreads edit: There is a translator listed on the Goodreads website. Review was originally written for another site.

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Review: A Kind of Mirraculas Paradise: A True Story About Schizophrenia

A Kind of Mirraculas Paradise: A True Story About Schizophrenia by Sandy Allen
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

As someone who suffers from a form of this disease, I found this book great but also difficult at the same time. While you have to understand that a biography based on the writing of someone with...I'll use the word delusions here ... should be taken with a grain of salt, it is so entirely real. Our realities our own, whether or not it happened.

Like Sandra's uncle, I've been in a mental hospital. I've been in prison. I've moved tons of places and struggled with keeping jobs for long periods of times. I'd like to think I've overcome my struggling but I'm still all to aware of my issues.

I'm glad for the fact that we get to share in Bob's life story. It rushes by at the end, which is my only dislike of the manuscript.

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Review: Dot Con: The Art of Scamming a Scammer

Dot Con: The Art of Scamming a Scammer by James Veitch
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

Dot Con is a collection of emails between comedian James Veitch and different spam senders. I've got to say, I'm a little disappointed. I'm a fan of stand up comedy and when I saw this book I immediately remembered who James was so I jumped at the chance to get my hands on this. There's nothing new here. If you've seen any of his shows, you aren't going to discover America for the first time or strike oil. Which isn't to say that the book is bad. It's dated. Is it still fun reading about how angry the spammers get when James goes off script and starts making them do things they don't want to? Yes. There's a lot of very similar emails in this short book that by the end, which you'll get to in under an hour for sure, it feels too redundant. The exchanges start lacking the finesse.

And I also always believe this guy to be the spider email guy. Then I'll remember that that's David Thorne.

If you are newer to comedy and have never heard of James Veitch, you would get a kick out of this. For someone like myself, it was like re-watching a comedy special where you knew all the jokes.

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Review: I Am C-3PO: The Inside Story

I Am C-3PO: The Inside Story by Anthony Daniels
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Anthony Daniels is one of those often overlooked people who are actually overly entertaining. He easily takes over any panel or interview he is involved with almost as much as the word 'over' has domineered this review so far.

I am C-3PO is great on multiple levels. It give us insight on the actor himself who I'm sure most people didn't realize was actually trained in theater. He's not a random guy in a robot suit in a movie that by chance made it big. Then we also get details on the movies themselves. What shooting them was like. What happened behind the scenes. How they made Luke's vehicle float on Tatooine. The book is filled with Daniel's comedic wit. One thing I will point out is that is was written and released prior to Rise of Skywalker coming out. I feel like those that have seen that film will feel differently about how Daniel's ended the book, or the stories from his final day of shooting.

Daniels is a treat and hopefully he writes more. I'm sure Anthony, of all people, has much more to say. He deserves it.

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Review: The Night Eternal

The Night Eternal by Guillermo del Toro
My rating: 2 of 5 stars

Going into this third book, I honestly expected it to be closer to a four or five star book...

I had just gotten through the slog of the Silmarillion which I enjoyed but anyone who has read it and will speak honestly about it will say it's not much of a page turner. What I enjoy about the Strain books is that they are quick reads. I can also stop randomly mid-page to take care of real life stuff and come right back to the books without trying to retrace in my mind what was going on. It's all very simple and it works.

The third book has a two year time jump, and right away the whole story has gone to pieces. There's kind of a love triangle thing going but not a real love triangle at that point. People flip flop their allegiances. Without the old man to lead things, you really miss his presence because all of these supposedly smart and clever people suddenly are doing rash and irresponsible things. Yes, the world is changed, but...meh. And the closer I got to the end of the book it slowly started becoming a chore as I realized overall I didn't really care how things turned out for everybody. The last 30 pages were probably the hardest. It's a shame because you have two books which are mostly great..and then you have this one which suddenly loses it's soul. I'd say it's worth two stars..maybe almost three.

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Review: Over the Top: A Raw Journey to Self-Love

Over the Top: A Raw Journey to Self-Love by Jonathan Van Ness
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

Queer Eye was one of those shows that when it originally aired I was definitely not it's target audience. A straight, white, who gives a **** teenager whose fashion sense and overall physical appearance could be described as....lacking. I cringe to see my middle school/high school photos. Netflix's new incarnation changed the dynamic of the show and one thing it constantly hammers is that it's not really a show about five gay guys. It's a show about five guys, who happen to be gay, devoting their time to helping others who may not have made time to help themselves. Okay, to the book...

Jonathan is the most flamboyant and over the top of the current fab five. I'm actually surprised to learn that he spent so much time in hair cutting/styling school since for every makeover on the show he says he's going to trim their beards a little bit and then proceeds to remove them completely most of the time. Yikes. The book actually makes me like Jonathan less. I appreciate the openness and honesty about his life and struggles, but something rubbed me the wrong way. Is it worth reading for fans of the show? Sure. Would Tan have been a more interesting person to read about? Absolutely.

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Review: Souls: A Short Story Collection

Souls: A Short Story Collection by Terri Bruce
My rating: 2 of 5 stars

Lets talk about that cover. I love the artwork, but the font used is extremely off-putting to me. I almost wish the title was smaller, perhaps subtle between the two figures. It looks like what a middle school boy would use on a school project. Find a nice picture, then search for a cool font to go over it even if the font doesn't really "work." For a middle school student, they can get away with it. For a professionally published book, maybe not. This cover kept me up last night as I laid in bed debating if I really wanted to read this or not, That's how bad that font is. You can't judge a book by it's cover. Except sometimes you can.

Let me just say that I didn't hate this. But I also didn't love it enough to want to own a copy of it. What possible readers have to understand is that this is collected fiction. Not every story will work for everybody. I had Unnatural Creatures on a shelf next to me while I read this and lord knows I did not love every one of those stories. Its really about personal taste. With that being said, i'm choosing not to do a review story by story as I originally planned. For the two or three I really liked, I don't feel like it's necessary to spew negativity over the rest of it since it didn't jive with me.

Now, with that being said...I did notice that the stories I liked the best were the more contemporary ones or the ones written closer to the present date. I liked that each story had a blurb in the beginning explaining when they were written and what for. It showed me that Terri has great potential as if you sorted the stories chronologically then they get better and better. I also feel like the first story was one of the weakest in the book. For a short story collection, you should start with something that is going to make someone want to read the next one. It didn't work. I see the potential and I actually trust Terri as a writer and storyteller. Based on what I thought was good, I would absolutely give her another try if she publishes something new. This particular collection didn't work with me, but I'm interested.

One last thing...I did not like the introduction to the book. It pulled me out right away and made me feel like a student was trying to justify everything we were about to read next by telling us about themselves. The Cover plus the introduction plus the weak first story resulted in a bad combination. This book may be a pass for me, but Terri Bruce is not.

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Review: The Silmarillion

The Silmarillion by J.R.R. Tolkien
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

The Silmarillion taunted me from my bookshelf. As my reading time is dwindling I decided to fit it in and see if I can finally get into it. About midway through, I looked up some interviews with people talking about the books and everyone seemed to have the same struggle.

First off, as my mother told me years and years ago, don't expect to go into this trying to discover another Hobbit or Lord of the Rings. It's not written that way. The Silmarillion is presented much like the way Norse myths are written. Each chapter tells a specific story but for the most part they are all interconnected in the telling of the Silmarillion itself which is a story in it's barest form about three gems of light and an Elven family cursed by their own oath. There's a lot more too it, but that's going to be your main plot.

Since it's written from the vantage of someone telling a story, and not dropping you into the story itself, it's very easy to get bored or sidetracked of what is being said. Each character has two or three names, a lot of which are similar to other characters. Then each place gets about five. When all is said and done, I often wondered if I *needed* to know most of them. Sure, it's world building, but it fights against the way the story is presented so much that an entire chapter of explaining the layout of the world splits up the tale itself. Right when the Silmarillion gets good, it takes a step back and distracts itself. Then it's not until the later chapters that everything picks up again.

Originally I was going to rate this three stars but the more I think about the events of the book I do feel it warrants four. It's too good to dismiss for being "inaccessible" at first. The beginning sections about the creation of the world and who the Valir were is not how the rest of the book flows, so bear with it.

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Review: AAAlligator!

AAAlligator! by Judith Henderson
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Everything about AAAlligator! is fun. It's silly without crossing over into the terrible sense of humor writing people fall into when telling stories to kids. I read it out loud, acting out the characters as I went, and was having a splendid time of it. My audience was youtube and phone addicted children and this got them to stop everything electronic and become captivated over something positive for once. The pictures were also really well done. The style fit the story perfectly and there's a lot of little subtle humorous things hiding throughout.

The story is about a boy who goes into the woods and meets an Alligator. At first he feeds the Alligator and then sings it a lullaby but the next day it shows up at his house. They become friends, much to the townspeople's discomfort. Then they realize the Alligator is not that bad and want to give him all of their leftovers. As long as he eats those, he wont eat people, you see. The Mayor, however, does not like this. The Alligator has to hide while everyone bands together to try to come up with a solution. Eventually, they disguise the Alligator as a whale because why not. And it works!

I loved this so much. This is the type of book that Youth Service Librarians and Teachers would read to children. It's funny, captivating, and has a charming quality to it overall.

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Review: Children of Ash and Elm: A History of the Vikings

Children of Ash and Elm: A History of the Vikings by Neil Price
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Amazing, but exhausting.

Right away I'm going to tell you that this book is for people who love history, cultures, and who have the willingness and drive to learn the truth about Vikings. This is absolutely not the book for someone that thinks a viking is a fat singing guy with horns on his head at the opera, or who get misled with what I'll call the modern media version of Vikings we see in things like Assassins Creed: Valhalla and The Last Kingdom TV Show.

The intro gives us Neil's credentials but for those that want to know: "Neil Price is distinguished professor and chair of archaeology at Uppsala University, Sweden. He has been researching, teaching, and writing on the Vikings for nearly thirty-five years"

In other words, he is THE expert on all things Viking.

What I loved about this is that he constantly dispels our idea of who the vikings were. Sure, parts of their culture as represented today are true to form but the portrayals tend to disregard a lot of who they were and how they acted. He also takes a history is written by the winners approach to telling their story, constantly reminding us that a lot of their own texts are in existent and we developed our viewpoint based on the writings of their rivals and neighbors. I also liked how Neil talked about the Norse Mythology which a lot of us are familiar with but in a way that showed how it truly related to the Vikings themselves. These aren't just stories, they are beliefs.

Now, I am going through some personal stuff so although I found this book amazing and fascinating, I also found it really exhausting. I don't know if it's because of my own issues or because the book is extremely heavy with information. I would absolutely recommend this book, but would caution that you have to be really committed to it. I trust Neil with the Vikings the way I trust Zahi Hawass with the Egyptians.

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Review: Somewhere in the Dark

Somewhere in the Dark by R.J. Jacobs
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

My Grandfather was big on mysteries. Of course, he was of the generation raised on radio which can act as a gateway drug to the genre. Mystery and Crime novels were usually what I found him reading with the occasional random genre thrown in. My mother mainly read science fiction and fantasy which is what I was mainly brought up on. I branch out and hop around to all different forms of literature nowadays and this book can be counted as one of the reasons I don't dismiss something just because it isn't my 'norm.'

It was great! I do have to say that I did figure out who did it right in the beginning, which is one of the reasons I can't give this a perfect five stars. I do like being right, but it takes a bit of the fun out of it when you can solve the mystery and have to wait around for the characters to catch up with you. Now, is that the fault of R.J. Jacobs? Not at all. Even with books that aren't mysteries I've noticed I'm beginning to realize where stories are going and how plots are going to play out. It comes from being a big reader. So I don't fault the author at all and honestly there were a few moments in the book where I thought "Wait a minute, is he seriously going to blindside me and actually make this person the killer instead? Am I completely wrong?" It would've been a killer twist.

It takes awhile for the story to get set up. Our main character has a lot of history that we have to get through before we enter into the thick of things. At first the constant flashbacks bothered me but then I realized it was setting me up for the rest of the book. They were there for a reason. I can't tell you how many times I've been annoyed by writers including flashbacks or walls of text to flesh out a character just to fill pages. Everything in this book is written because we need to know it. For a mystery, every detail counts.

At one point our main character finds herself imprisoned while they try to figure out if she's guilty or not of the crime. It made me uncomfortable because seven years ago I was falsely accused of a crime where I actually spent two weeks in prison before I was released and proven innocent. This book brought back a lot of memories from that. I'm surprised Mr. Jacobs was able to accurately portray what it felt like. He gave Jessie the right voice.

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Review: Benjamin Franklin: An American Life

Benjamin Franklin: An American Life by Walter Isaacson
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Benjamin Franklin never struck me as someone I wanted to read about. He popped in and out of other things I had read in the past. Usually a mere mention. I found myself struggling to find something to do during work hours and thought this was a big enough book to fill the gap.

It blows my mind that Benjamin Franklin was not just the key and kite guy. There were so many other scientific progresses made by him that I'm surprised he's not talked about more in school. His family life was intriguing, especially his relationship with his son the loyalist and then his grandson. Then of course there's the founding of our country and Ben's hand and influence on it. Franklin really seemed to do what he wanted with is life, wherever it would take him. He was very quick witted and always willing to put up an argument for what he thought was right.

This is an amazing person who is often a side character to the larger story of our nation. I would much rather be celebrating Ben Franklin day than President's Day. Great Book by Isaacson and highly recommended.

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Review: Grant

Grant by Ron Chernow
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

My favorite part of biographies are the deaths.

This one starts with Grant dying, and it ends with him dying, so this was even better. The civil war was exciting. I was in suspense the whole time. Something really cool was when Grant sat down on a tree stump to do some thinking and it made me remember the title of a book from when I was little - Highlight's Best Board Games from Around the World.

The parts about Grant being President up until his death later on really slumped for me. I have no interest in racism and American History when it comes to whites and blacks. I know it happened, but it's not an interesting subject to me. I enjoyed the Lincoln Assassination in this book. Maybe I'm a sick individual. What really got me about it was just how deep the plot went and how Grant was also a target. I always pictured it as some one man split-second decision type of deal.

All in all, despite dragging a bit later on, I thought this was a wonderfully written book and Ron Chernow is my biography go-to guy.

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Review: Best Served Cold

Best Served Cold by Joe Abercrombie
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Joe Abercrombie sets the talent bar so high that I don't think there's a contemporary author who thrills me the same way. He is consistently putting out great books with such execution that I feel like there's a line in the sand with everybody on one side and Abercrombie on the other. Someone please prove me wrong so I have hopes for anyone else, because once again I'm delivered another spectacular read.

I originally read the entire First Law trilogy, and then I believe I read A Little Hatred next. I did find my way to the standalone novels eventually, but I read them in reverse order. I consider them to be the Shivers trilogy, even if he's only a secondary character in the 5th and 6th books. Reading it backwards, I already knew the results of a lot of things that happened and the future fates of certain characters so I would say that it does matter what order you read the books in. Shivers whole quest for revenge is more developed this way, for instance. As is everything that happens with Cosca.

I still love how cinematic Abercrombie's writing is. When you read about a battle it's usually one side goes one way, the other advances across from them. People hit each other, some fall dead. The heroes survive, ect. Not in these books. Every movement is expertly choreographed. The landscape and surroundings are all developed so it's not a battle on a random hill or in a building. You know every detail of the layout. Things get destroyed. One of my favorite visuals is when part of a battle ends up with people fighting in a river and the water is sloshing all around them. There's blood, sweat, dirt and mud. People are struggling for balance, for any sense of control. It's chaotic the way a battle should be and you can see all of that through the writing. It's meticulous and thoughtful.

Sanderson has lectures that you can watch on youtube which are all about how to write genre fiction and I would love for Abercrombie to have a series like that. Maybe a masterclass. It's fascinating to try to unravel his thought process.

There are many books about characters seeking revenge but curiously it was a nonfiction book that this one reminded me of. Vengeance, by George Jonas. It's about an undercover operation to get revenge for the Munich killings among other things but each hit gets it's own section. Just like Best Served Cold, not everyone made it out unscathed. I wonder if there was some connection there or if it was planned to be another generic, although First Law styled, revenge book.

Who wins in the end?
Does anybody?
The reader. Of course. I would recommend this to anybody but that goes for all Abercrombie books. September can't come fast enough.

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Review: This Eternity of Masks and Shadows

This Eternity of Masks and Shadows by Karsten Knight
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Storytelling is hard. When we think about Authors we usually fail to see the scope of all they do. The creation, the crafting. Everything inside of a book is a thought out idea. Ultimately the author gives us the story that they want us to read, that they expect us to read. The story that it is. A finite product. And thus my disappointment begins.

A lot of people love this book, based on the reviews I've scanned. I hated the very beginning. What got my interest, although very minimally, was the blurb about what the book was about. Much to my surprise, a page or two into the book it almost says the blurb word for word. It actually might. I haven't rechecked. Instead of organically developing, we have it plastered right in our faces: Gods of all the pantheons walk among us. People know they exist. Some are good, some are terrible. And we as readers are to accept this, which is fine...but it's also not. I wished deeply that instead of how we are introduced to this and to different Gods that it would have been closer to Neil Gaiman's American Gods. Someone referenced that it reminded them of Percy Jackson and to be honest, the way the gods come about do have similarities. All flash and bang, very Vegas. This book is a grade past that, except it's holding itself back.

One part that particularly bothered me, spoilers incoming from the beginning, is that when Cairn finds her mother's lair and then decides to meet up with the therapist she thinks that the lady is a mortal and doesn't understand why her mom would tell her that she was a God and it turned out that the therapist is a God too. The girl knows her mother is a God, and that Gods exist freely around the world, and that it's not secret to anyone. Why wouldn't she right away think "This lair must have to do with my mother being a god" or "This mysterious therapist must actually be a god" This is the first conclusion that should have been jumped to. The story is fighting it's own logic here to make an introduction and lead us forward.

It was inspired enough to keep me interested through to the end. Aside from minor criticism I had throughout the book, including the two examples listed above, I didn’t think this book was bad. I had pinned the first reveal from the very beginning. When the second reveal and first twist happened, I was a little surprised but it wasn’t left field. The second twist also did not really give me a mind-blown feeling. That’s what I was looking for and it didn’t come for me. There were many moments I thought were too rough and underdeveloped in the beginning but it certainly rushes you along.

I did enjoy how Karsten presented the different Pantheons trees. His use of uncommon gods, with the one exception of Ra, was also a highlight. We don’t need to see another Thor, or a Zeus. Just so I’m not listing strictly thunder gods we also don’t need a Poseidon. Nanook, Raijin, Sedna, the others whose names I’ve forgotten even though I’ve just finished reading this. All great choices. A novice would’ve thrown Odin and Loki in there. I admire Karsten for that.

The story itself would have been remarkably better if it was written with more maturity, aimed at older audiences.

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Review: King Rat

King Rat by James Clavell
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

I'm pretty sure I meant to read the other King Rat novel and acquired this one by accident. Amazing! I couldn't ask for a better accident. I flew through this and proceeded to tell everyone I work with how great it is. The characters are developed with such care and quality that each one feels real. Usually books have a collection of traits that they throw around. "This person will be smart and nerdy with dark hair and glasses" "This person will be tall and mysterious" but the nerdy guy can't be mysterious, ect. ect. Each person in this book shared qualities, and neither were good nor bad. They are all prisoners trying to survive the best way they can. Even what you could consider a minor twist at the end was presented so perfectly. We are who we choose to be. My favorite part was the bit about the dog.

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Review: Norse Mythology

Norse Mythology by Neil Gaiman
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

I read this because I felt there were a lot of Norse Myths I didn't know and I've always been interested in them. It turns out there were only a few stories in this collection, all of which I already knew. If there's other ones, I would like to be pointed in the right direction. Love the Norse Gods over the Greek.

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Review: Bossypants

Bossypants by Tina Fey
My rating: 2 of 5 stars

Well, I did it. I finally read this. It's been on and off my radar for awhile. I'm not big on modern SNL and I'm not a Tina Fey fanatic. I simply thought it would be an interesting read. Maybe for behind the scenes SNL insight. It was okay. Two stars simply because that Ellen book I read around the same time was horrid.

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Review: This Side of Paradise

This Side of Paradise by F. Scott Fitzgerald
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

The long socialism conversation in the car cost an otherwise great novel to lose a couple of stars. There are clear moments where you can see Fitzgerald laying the ground work for The Great Gatsby. As well, for someone like me who hates heavy handed romance in novels I do appreciate how each of the relationships played out.

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Review: The Third Reich

The Third Reich by Roberto Bolaño
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Read back to back with the Rum Diaries, so I had a beautiful spanish locale in my mindset already. What a thrilling book. Bolano always takes me places unexpected. I feel like you never truly know his characters the more you do find out about them. The Third Reich has a lot of unknown and ultimately untold motivation. I'm shocked some company hasn't optioned this for a film. They won't do it justice, but I can see it happening.

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Review: Treasure Island

Treasure Island by Robert Louis Stevenson
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

A classic and rightfully so. Fun fact: Stevenson's inspiration for Long John Silver was his friend, William Henley. Henley is known for his poem, Invictus. Henley's daughter Margaret (well, her speech impediment) inspired the name Wendy for J.M. Barrie who wrote Peter Pan.

It's all connected, you see.

Curious that in every portrayal of Treasure Island, it's when they get to the actual Island that I start to have waning interest. For the record, the only film version I will vouch for is the Muppet Version.

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Review: The Rumphulus

The Rumphulus by Joseph G. Peterson
My rating: 1 of 5 stars

I wish I had more to say about this because the cover and description had me interested. Unfortunately, the truth of the matter is I found the style the book is written in to be too heavy on the rambling side. I've read other books or stories with a similar writing style which were much more forgiving. I understand why this book is like that but for an average everyday reader I feel that it's uninviting. When I look at a book I question whether it's something that's going to sell and I honestly don't feel that here. I have nothing to comment on the story.

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Review: The Count of Monte Cristo

The Count of Monte Cristo by Alexandre Dumas
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

The ending was a little anti-climatic for me. Maybe it's because I was tainted by the Guy Pierce movie. I liked how the characters revolved around each other. It was very Hugo-esque. I wonder if this will lead me to the Three Musketeers in due time, but for now I'm still undecided on Dumas as a writer because Dumas as a person doesn't appease me. The Count is a classic and I do think it is a novel that MUST be read. I'm very surprised they don't teach it in school but kids are still forced to read Catcher in the Rye.

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Review: Rock Heaven

Rock Heaven by Fabien Vehlmann
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Saturday and Sunday are the names of the main characters, who happen to be lizards. These comics have definite Calvin and Hobbes vibes to them. The humor itself is very self aware. There's a scene near the beginning where one character asks another what his earliest memory is, and in a thought bubble it shows the first panel of the comic between them. Also it was very surprising how developed the world itself was. There are tons of places and characters that you run into. You wouldn't expect what at first seems like a simple comic to be epic in scope. Lots of care and dedication went into it's creation. I would recommend this to people who like Calvin and Hobbes, Bones, and other such comics.

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Review: The Beast, and Other Tales

The Beast, and Other Tales by Jóusè d'Arbaud
My rating: 2 of 5 stars

I found myself having to do some research on the author to try to muster up some encouragement over this book. It has received a lot of praise in it's original form. The translation also is supposedly spectacular. I myself did not enjoy it beyond the first story in the collection, the one whose title graces the cover. I was surprised at how short each story was, and how abrupt they ended. I can see why other people feel this is a great work which I do not disagree with. For someone like me, it didn't capture my attention too well. Perhaps on a different day. Overall, I'd say read it for the first story and if you liked that one, give the second a chance. The others don't hold up as well. It's quick enough to make you feel like you haven't wasted your time is you dislike it.

Also noted: This book is retailing for $19.99? For how short it is, and how I gauged it...I don't think it's likely I'd been willing to shell out $5.

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Review: I Must Say: My Life as a Humble Comedy Legend

I Must Say: My Life as a Humble Comedy Legend by Martin Short
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

I'm a fan of Martin Short although I couldn't tell you why. I was born too late to appreciate most of his comedy. I never saw him on SNL. Most movies he was in where he was considered great are from before I was born..except for of course Father of the Bride. I hate Jiminy Glick. But I appreciate Martin Short. I did love his Netflix special with Steve Martin, for example. This book peaked my interest and I loved hearing not only of Martin's life but that of all the other comedy legends he was around with. I had no clue that he dated Gilda Radner! Martin's life wasn't all laughs. There are great moments of sadness as well. I was also shocked at how he humanized other "famous" people. Steve Martin calling Paparazzi bastards sticks out in my mind. It's Steve Martin! He can't use that language!

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Review: King Rat

King Rat by James Clavell
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

I'm pretty sure I meant to read the other King Rat novel and acquired this one by accident. Amazing! I couldn't ask for a better accident. I flew through this and proceeded to tell everyone I work with how great it is. The characters are developed with such care and quality that each one feels real. Usually books have a collection of traits that they throw around. "This person will be smart and nerdy with dark hair and glasses" "This person will be tall and mysterious" but the nerdy guy can't be mysterious, ect. ect. Each person in this book shared qualities, and neither were good nor bad. They are all prisoners trying to survive the best way they can. Even what you could consider a minor twist at the end was presented so perfectly. We are who we choose to be. My favorite part was the bit about the dog.

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Review: The Viking Spirit: An Introduction to Norse Mythology and Religion

The Viking Spirit: An Introduction to Norse Mythology and Religion by Daniel McCoy
My rating: 2 of 5 stars

I was excited going into this book to learn more Norse Myths. The excitement quickly died when I was introduced to Daniel's writing style. It was very flat-line. The myths themselves, which you don't get to until past a hundred pages in the book, have brief introductions to them which are better than his telling of the myths. Two stars are only given for the few myths I didn't already know.

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Review: The Virtual Swallows of Hog Island

The Virtual Swallows of Hog Island by Julianna Baggott
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

I absolutely loved this. It felt original, and honest. I do not know if the author has written anything else but this was so comfy that if she has I am eager to pick up the rest. When I set myself up with any form of entertainment, I ask myself "Does this wow me?" I don't have time in my life for things that I am unimpressed with. This story gave me that wow.

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Review: The Last Jedi

The Last Jedi by Jason Fry
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Better than the movie.

The first half of the book was absolutely dreadful. I could not stand it and felt it was written for children. The second half of the book picked up. The insights of the character's inner thoughts really fleshed out the problems the movie had and gave me a new respect for it.

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Review: The Man Who Laughs

The Man Who Laughs by Victor Hugo
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

I liked it, but didn't love it. It is classic Hugo in the sense that it's tragic and the characters are great. I am not fond of love stories, however, and that's what knocked a star off. Would have liked it to have more adventure but it was a perfect story in it's own way.

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Review: Taliesin

Taliesin by Stephen R. Lawhead
My rating: 1 of 5 stars

My coworker swore by these books. I think he has fond memories of reading them in prison. I don't have fond memories of having read it now. The concept of Atlantis and King Arthur intertwining is intriguing but I was mostly bored by the constant barrage of God.

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Review: Dinosailors

Dinosailors by Deb Lund
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

I went into this blind to read to some unrelenting children. I'd say the most interesting part of the book is when the dinosaurs projectile vomit off the side of the ship.

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Review: Almost Interesting

Almost Interesting by David Spade
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Good, but felt like it was missing a lot of stories about Sandler and Farley. Not that it was about them, but I was hoping for some more laughs.

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Review: The Curse of Oak Island: The Story of the World's Longest Treasure Hunt

The Curse of Oak Island: The Story of the World's Longest Treasure Hunt by Randall Sullivan
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

I read this on an airplane while on my way to testify for a murder trial. This book was a lot more interesting than any events that followed over the next few days. It's definitely for fans of the show, of which I am although I havent seen the recent seasons due to life getting in the way. I will admit though that the book does a good job at reminding us that the show really is a *show* and that there's a lot of behind the scenes things that happened over the years that we never got to see.

I was worried this book would be a quick cash grab but I promise you all, it is not.

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Review: Anna Karenina

Anna Karenina by Leo Tolstoy
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

Anna Karenina is the worst part of Anna Karenina

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Review: Troublemaker: Surviving Hollywood and Scientology

Troublemaker: Surviving Hollywood and Scientology by Leah Remini
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

It's a quick read, but not worth it. Everything mentioned in the book was told in her 60 Minutes Interview. There was nothing new or noteworthy that was different. I wanted insider secrets of the Scientologist but, like I said, it was the same info she gave during her special. Totally skip this if you have access to youtube.

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Review: A Face Without a Heart

A Face Without a Heart by Rick R. Reed
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

For those of you who saw the movie "Beastly" and liked it, this is the book for you.

It's a modernized version of the Picture of Dorian Gray with a drag queen named Henrietta whose humor makes up for the lack of Wilde himself writing this book. Yes, I'm aware. The main character, the handsome Dorian of this story, is oddly named Gary. Maybe because of how close it is to Gray? Gary doesn't scream hunky guy. He's perfection personified. Despite the brief backstory we get in one of the earlier chapters, I still don't understand how someone described such as he doesn't have any friends he hangs out with or people he socializes with. He meets Liam and suddenly Liam is his best friend. Then Henrietta. You don't see the relationships develop because the time jumps around to get to that point.

I thought there'd be something more about Liam going on with the holographic painting deal. When we get to the wish which sets the downfall in motion, Gary comments on how it seemed Liam was engulfed in shadows. I was expecting him to somehow know about the curse and how everything was going to go horrible for Gary. It didn't work out that way.

Gary, once he became the prime jerk of the universe, was very intolerable.

As I pointed out, this is on the Beastly level of adaptations. It's not bad but did we really need it?

I'm curious to see, because I did like the different characters, other stuff the author has done.

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